Need You Be A 'Super Parent'?

Every parent wants to do the best for their child, but it's important not to set yourself impossible standards that you have no chance of living up to. Don't beat yourself up by belieiving in the 'super parent' myth - we all experience good days and bad, successes and failures.

You probably remember what your idea was of a perfect parent. Did you look to June Cleaver for the way to handle your children? Maybe you watched Bachelor Father to see what dad would do in a given situation. Regardless of who you used as a role model or how many books you read you probably didn’t feel like you ever earned the title of super parent. When are children are born, they do not come equipped with a warranty or an instruction manual. You learn parenting skills by being a parent. It’s trial and error and what works for your best friend may not work for you.

Let’s dismiss the myth of the super parent. You will never live up to that lofty title. You will have days when you can celebrate successes and days you wish you could do over. You are not perfect and will not always think logically and unemotionally when it comes to your children and their actions. Perfect super parents are found only on television, real life is much harder. We are not perfect and we will make mistakes and have regrets. We should not let the fact that we are not a super parent make us feel guilty.

Mothers and Fathers get one day a year, when that day rolls around most of us wonder if we measured up. Were we good enough to get that special card from our children? Did we do enough for them, teach them respect and love, help them grow into strong children and adults? Guilt can cause us to cringe but they do not have to. If you have raised your children with love, they will probably return that love even if you did make a few mistakes. If your children have not yet accepted you are not perfect, take comfort in that little Mother’s Day or Father’s Day card made from construction paper and macaroni. Rejoice when you look at pictures of your child when they were young, and be thankful for the opportunity to be a parent.

Growing up we are led to believe that super parents did exist…somewhere. More often we end up feeling guilty about our defects as a parent. We linger on the times we lost our cool, raised our voices, or maybe had a meltdown in front of our kids. And we often live in fear of “everyone else’s parents.” You know the type, every child has one of those in mind when they try to persuade you to allow them a special freedom they are not prepared for. We probably have all used that excuse at some point in our life. Do not let guilt and “everyone else’s parent” tempt you to give in and lose control over the situation.

It’s all right if you are an imperfect parent and not a super parent. Even though you will run into some who may think they fit that profile, they are just not a reality. They are a myth, perpetuated by mothers and fathers who try to be ideal and fail. Drag yourself up and realize that we are imperfect and accept yourself as the parent you are. Just try to improve where possible, but don’t beat yourself up if you fall short of “super parent.”